.:.:.:.:RTTP.Mobile:.:.:.:.
[<--back] [Home][Pics][News][Ads][Events][Forum][Band][Search]
full forum | bottom

what the fuck??

[views:3300][posts:16]
 ______________________________
[May 23,2005 2:19pm - nate ""]
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This is to confirm that

NATHAN DEMONTIGNY
515 MAIN STREET RTE 28
WEST DENNIS MA 02670
has been ordained as a minister of the
Universal Life Church, Modesto, California.

Date of Ordination: 5/22/2005

by Kevin Andrews, Pastor
www.ulc.net
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your request for ordination has been processed, and you are now an ordained
minister of the Universal Life Church in Modesto, California! Please
record the above date of ordination for your records, as you may need this
information in the future to fill out the various forms of the
clergy. If you were ordained previously, the above date will constitute
a valid date upon which you were RE-ordained. Ordination is for life,
without price, and without question of your specific beliefs. You do NOT
need to pay any tithe, donation, or offering of any kind, now or in the future.

Ordinations are individually reviewed and forwarded to Universal Life
Church International Headquarters in Modesto, California, where it will be
recorded in the permanent church records.

As a minister, you are authorized by the church to perform the rites and
ceremonies of the church (except circumcision), including weddings,
funerals, baptisms and blessings, subject to the laws of your country,
state, or locality. Prior to conducting any civil ceremony (such as
marriages), you should know and comply with the laws pertaining to your
area of jurisdiction.

You are entitled to all privileges and courtesies normally offered to
members of the clergy.

Your commitment is to always do the right thing. It is your responsibility
to peacefully and sincerely determine the right course of action, and to
avoid infringing on the rights of others. You alone are responsible for
your actions as a minister.
 ______________________________________
[May 23,2005 2:19pm - the_reverend ""]
that's what I'm a minister of.
 ______________________________
[May 23,2005 2:21pm - nate ""]
this is funny shit... did you do anything yet with your super power??
 __________________________________________
[May 23,2005 2:39pm - largefreakatzero ""]
Just be happy that you received your life's calling in convenient email form.
 __________________________________________
[May 23,2005 2:42pm - davefromthegrave ""]
It'll be funny if the only thing you do is circumsize someone
 _____________________________________
[May 24,2005 9:18am - Scoracrasia ""]
That's pretty fucked up Nate. Never knew you swung that way!
 ________________________________________
[May 24,2005 9:22am - Josh_hates_you ""]
so do ministers get to touch little boys too?
 _______________________________
[May 24,2005 10:55am - nate ""]
bahaha it was a joke... a friend told me he joined and was approved so I figured they would deny me... I mean shit, don't you have to believe in God before you can be ordained as a minister??
 ______________________________________
[May 24,2005 11:04am - Scoracrasia ""]
nate said:bahaha it was a joke... a friend told me he joined and was approved so I figured they would deny me... I mean shit, don't you have to believe in God before you can be ordained as a minister??



Na, not in modern times. You just have to be a pedophile.
 _______________________________
[May 24,2005 11:07am - nate ""]
I didn't see that anywhere on the application though, they should add it so they can instantly approve people. bahaha
 _______________________________
[May 24,2005 11:10am - nate ""]
anyone notice this is the same town Scott Peterson was from? I wonder if he was ordained... lol
 ___________________________________
[May 24,2005 11:10am - succubus ""]
nope, you do not have to believe in God
and aaron "the reverend" has performed marriages before and we're flying to California where he's going to do another one this summer
 _______________________________
[May 24,2005 11:12am - nate ""]
holy shit... so we can really marry people with this super power?
 _________________________________________
[May 24,2005 11:28am - KillerKadoogan ""]
i signed up for the sole purpose of putting "Reverend Benjamin Farley" in the Exploding Christ booklet and having it be official
 ______________________________________
[May 24,2005 11:43am - Scoracrasia ""]
I've got a cock.
 _____________________________________
[May 24,2005 11:49am - anonymous  ""]
:tmnt2:
 _____________________________________
[May 24,2005 11:49am - anonymous  ""]
People suck


Reply
[login ]
SPAM Filter: re-type this (values are 0,1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,A,B,C,D,E, or F)
message

top [Vers. 0.12][ 0.008 secs/8 queries][refresh][